


blue

by sincerlyconnor



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe, College-ish age, Connor Deserves Happiness, Connor is less angry, Evan is less anxious, Fluffy, M/M, Please stop stealing from my garden au, Strangers to Lovers, This Is Gay as Fuck, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, You might miss it, kind of, sprinkle of angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-17
Updated: 2017-12-22
Packaged: 2019-02-16 00:55:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,353
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13043157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sincerlyconnor/pseuds/sincerlyconnor
Summary: In suburban New Jersey there was a small white house with a small white picket fence.The minimal cottage had one extravagant sight. The sizable garden with flowers of all shapes and colors weaved around the yard.Evan Hansen adored his small house and even more adored his garden- but there was one problem.His blue flowers kept going missing.





	1. question

In suburban New Jersey lived a small white house with a small white fence.  
  
In the back of this house, an extravagant garden with flowers ranging from all colors; but one problem.  
  
The blue flowers kept going missing.

Evan had sorted all his flowers by Color, red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and shades of purple all organized it boxes of two by two feet.

Evan adores absolutely everything gardening, both the procedure and the product.

He loved sprinkling in the seeds and patting in the soil neatly. The feeling of soil over his hands and the pride of when he waters the plants are his favorite feelings.

When a plant begins to grow, Evan feels the kind of Euphoria people get when they make friends; but Evan's not very good at that.

He's so proud of his plants when they grow, he checks on his flowers everyday and makes sure they're healthy, watering them when they need it. It's almost like a second therapy to him;

However, one afternoon late in may, he goes to water his flowers like he always does, and something is off. One blue tulip was dug out from his garden.

Evan doesn't think much of it at first, he assumed at animal just dug it up and ran, which in hindsight was a little delusional.

He decides to by something to replace it tomorrow, but when he went to plant the replacement, another one was missing.

He's confused and now suspicious, what kind of animal would do this? Then, the next day, a chunk of the flowers were missing.

Upon seeing this, he is appalled. This wasn't an animal, someone was stealing his flowers. Luckily he had bought enough blue Lillie's to replace all the missing flowers.

A part of him was confused. Why would someone come and take his plants? He couldn't explain is to himself, so he decided to stay up all night and catch this person.

Evan's eyelids felt heavy as the sunrise creeped through his window. He had stayed awake all night and no person has shown up. He feels his eyes start to slowly fall closed before something catches his eye.

A figure lit only by the dawn sun places two hands on Evan's fence and hikes one leg, then both to the other side. The person is tall and lanky looking, and Evan cant make out much of him because of the lack of light.

He's captivated by the way the man walks, as if hes walking on a plank. It's sloppy yet graceful how he sauntered to the place that the blue flowers were planted.

The boy sits criss crossed and Evan raises his arm to open the window and shout, but he pauses when he realizes something. The man isn't actually taking anything.

He's just gazing, looking at the plants without moving for several minutes.

Evan watches, brows furrowed. He drops his hand lightly, entranced by the way the man sees the sun rising and panics, moving quickly and digging the flowers up.

He seems to only keep a little soil around the roots. He collects three blue hibiscus flowers before he stands up and runs back to the fence, climbing over it.

He dashes into the early morning and for some reason, Evan couldn't bring himself to stop him. It takes him a few seconds to shake his head and bring him back to reality, and for the first time a thought came to Evan's mind.

**Why WAS this man taking his flowers?**

And now, that itch to know why became greater than the want for him to stop. He had a massive _desire_ to discover the reason he was taking them, so he was _going_ to find out.

* * *

 

Instead of buying seeds that afternoon he buys actual flowers to plant for the boy to take. He remembers the way the boy walked, his long hair, and the way he gazed stone like at Evan's flowers.

And so, after he finishes planting the Morning Glories, he sits where the flower thief sat and picks the soil off his hands, the sun hitting just half of him.

It bothers him a little how one side of his face is warmer than the other but he can't will himself to stand up. He sits there, legs aching from being crossed so long and mind scattering for the better half of 30 minutes.

After he stands he wavers, making his way to his house deciding to wake himself up from his daydreaming. He drinks some tea and tries to write his plan for later.

He's planted lots of new blue flowers for the boy and now all he has to do is wait for him to show up- the only problem is what to say when he confronts him.

'hey man! stop stealin my flowers!' Nah, too assertive.

'hey, please tell me why you're doin that?' Nope. He writes and revises in his head until he has an okay phrase to say.

He waits until night falls to turn the lights in his house off so it seems as if he has fallen asleep. He sits at his kitchen table tracing his middle finger on the rim of his cup of water.

He waits until about half an hour until dawn before he steps out into his backyard, walking to the oak tree that lay a few feet from his garden, hiding behind it and deciding to wait there.

He sits, the dark slowly shifts into a clouded light, and Evan hears scuffs and small noises as the man jumps over the fence.

He waits until it's a little quiet before he cautiously tip toes around the tree.

He can only see the back of the boy, but he can see him crouching and his arms moving as he digs up the flowers. He waits, but as the boy stands Evan finally speaks.

"You know you can buy those right?" The boy jumps half a mile, turning on his heel to face the other.

"I..." he glances down at the flowers in his hands and then looks back up. "I am so sorry."

Evan chuckles nervously, happy that the man didn't run, but his anxiety started to kick in a little. "It's okay.. I mean it's not but I'm not mad,"

A small silence ensues as neither know what to say. It's an interesting sight, two boys looking at the ground two feet apart, one fiddling with his thumbs and the other holding stolen flowers remorsefully.

"C-can you tell me why?" Evan asks after a moment, seizing his bottom lip between his teeth.

"I uh..." He paused and when Evan looks up there's finally enough light for him to truly see him and wow he's gorgeous.

He has a model type bone structure and soft features, ivory skin and pink stretched into a regretful smile.

"It's hard to explain, here I'll uh, I'll put these back," He quickly squats down and scrambles to try and replant them, but Evan blinks quickly.

"N-No keep them keep them-" He pleads, waiting until the other stands to continue. "You can gladly keep them just- just tell me why you took them? Maybe over coffee?"

The boy blinks and looks down before nodding.

"Sure. Yeah. Can we do it later today? I'm sorta tired,"

Evan nods and smiles.

"Eleven?" He offers, and when he gets a nod and smile he then asks, "What's your name? I'm- Not gonna report you or anything I just wanna know," They share a small smile before the other boy flips his hair back.

"Connor," He hummed and boy does the other like the way it rolls off his tongue. "What's yours?"

"Evan," It's even lighter now so he can see more details of Connors face. His eyes are a crystal blue and he has thick eyelashes around them, skin clear with hair that falls and frames his face.

"I'll see you at eleven?" He inquires face looking more and more relieved by the second.

"Yeah. Bye Connor," The two share a wave and Connor leaves, jumping over the fence into another backyard and holy fuck he's my next door neighbor. He enters the back door of the house beside Evan's and the latter is almost in disbelief of how he never noticed the pretty boy next door.

* * *

 

By 10:54 Evan has coffee brewing and he's about to do his last minute tidy before he hears a knock on the door.

He scurries to open the door and when he does, he's bewildered. Contrasting with the pajamas he wore earlier, Connor now was sporting a black jean jacket and jeans that hugged his legs a little too nicely.

"Hey come in!" Evan smiles warmly and opens the door. Connor enters and he's polite but relaxed as they walk into the kitchen. Evan's kitchen has small counter space but an island in the middle.

"You have a nice house," Connor compliments. Evan agrees partially; it's small but nice. He only has four rooms in his house, a living room, a kitchen, a bathroom, and his bedroom. He likes having a small house, but he also wishes he had more space. It's a little cramped sometimes.

"Thank you. S-so, how are you?" Evan asks, leaning over the kitchen island with his elbows on the counter. He took a rubber band he had on his wrist earlier and fiddled with it.

"I'm good, got some sleep after out last interaction," Connor chuckled and damn even his laugh and voice were pretty.

"That's definitely um.. good," Evan gets nervous his anxiety tapping at the door. "I-I'm glad you're here, By the way," He assures, and Connors lips curl at the edges a little. "It was relieving discovering the thief of my flowers," He says it in a joking way so they both laugh.

"I'm really sorry about that though, it's kind of hard to explain why though..." He sighs runs a hand through his hair from the front back, but his curls return back.

"Well I'm ju- Oh!" It's like n epiphany how his eyes widen. "The coffee!" He turns and opens his cupboard, grabbing his favorite mug with leave drawing on it and places it on the counter. "Wh- What mug do you want?" He asks. "I have every color,"

Connor stands and puts his hands in his back pockets. "Blue, if that's alright."

Evan agrees and takes the mug out of the cupboard, closing said door and filling up Connors mug first, then his own. He opens the fridge and grabs the vanilla creamer he owns, pouring himself a generous amount and offering it to Connor.

The boy gladly accepts and something about this seems oddly domestic. Connors coffee is notably shades darker than Evan's, the latter being unable to handle bitter things. The too stir in their creamer and Evan adds some sugar before he puts things away and they return to the island.

"I-I can't help but notice that you picked a blue mug, and you only stole blue flowers," He says, and he worries that he's being too forward until Connor smiles.

"It's a lovely color," He says simply. "It.. calms me almost. I used to feel constant frustration and that was exhausting, so surrounding myself with blue helps somewhat."

Evan nods slightly. "How old are you? I-I mean- that sounds weird I'm just wondering,"

"I'm twenty, I'm in college for Dance actually but I've been bored since it's summer," He smiles. "And you?"

"Oh I'm in college for journalism actually yeah.. What kind of dance do you do?" At this point it's a question game and they both procrastinate the question that needs to be asked, but Evan's fine with that.

"I do a variety, Ballet, Jazz, Tap, but mostly Ballet, that's my forte I think," He speaks while running his thumb over the ceramic coffee mug.

"Really? You don't seem like the ballet type-" Evan freezes. "That sounded so mean Oh my God I'm- I'm so sorry I-"

"Hey," Connor interrupts him. "You're fine, I didn't take it that way. Honestly ballet is just kind of a release from the annoyingness of the world you know? I have a lot of... struggles that I can get away from by dancing."

Evan nods and beams. 

"You're quite interesting you know?" He says, drinking his coffee that was starting to cool down. 

Connor crossed his left leg over his other, smirking in a way that made Evan sort of flustered.

"I'm gonna choose to take that as a compliment Evan," He laughs softly and all Evan can do is blush.

"It was it was I-promise" Evan swallows and sets down his cup. "I'm sorry I have to ask," He declared, deciding to stop procrastinating. "Why did you have to steal my flowers?"

Connor sighs slightly but he has no negativity in his eyes.

"Well, it didn't start off as that. I would always see your garden from my bedroom window and admire it because fuck Evan, you can really garden!" 

Evan blushes a little more but he can't stutter out a thank you.

"And then, I was so  _curious_ , I just had to see them up close; I jumped over the fence and... I just kind of looked at them every night. The blue ones were my favorites obviously, and one night I was thinking 'I want one,' So I did.. And then it became a habit I suppose."

It feels like Connor isn't telling him the whole story but Evan leaves it at that. 

"Well, I was certainly confused,"

They share a laugh and Connor nods slowly.

"I'm sorry once again,"

"I was a little.. unnerved at first but I made a friend so- that's assuming you want to be friends though," Evan laughs awkwardly and Connor just smiles.

"Sure I do," He finishes the rest of his coffee. "I should probably be leaving soon, but you're welcome to come over tomorrow? For you know, friendship," 

Evan nods. 

"Yeah. Yeah I will, that sounds nice!" He rushes the words out like a script.

"You should come over around five, we can watch movies or what ever you'd prefer."

When they agree Evan walks Connor out, almost squealing when the latter winks before walking to his own house.


	2. learning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They both knew they had something more than platonic feelings for one another, but they hadn't said anything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> theres a small packet of angst in here stay safe!! (also i made larry a hugggge dick bc why not)

As Evan stands on Connors doorstep, he looks at the plant pot he has in his hands. It's a sky blue tiger lily in a brown pot, and Evan started to wonder if the gift was too much but when Connor opens the door in all his glory the thought disappears.

"Evan! Oh," He notices the flower and a grin cracks over his face. "Is that for me?" When he receives a nod Connor shakes his head in amusement. 

"I-I just thought instead of stealing them I could just give you one," He swipes his thumb over the wood of the pot and walks into Connors house and  _holy fucking blue._

Not everything was blue, but he had blue plants everywhere and the walls were a pastel shade of blue and of course, a blue circular rug in the middle of the room.

"You're a nerd," Connor says in an almost fond tone, beaming at the shorter boy.

"Is that a good thing?" Evan inquires, taking off his shoes and setting the plant on the window sill next to another.

"I'd say so," He pauses. "I have a lot of movies to choose from because I wasn't sure what kind you liked so... go ahead they're on the coffee table."

Evan nervously walks to the table and fingers through the DVDs, seeing a few he was interested in but he raises an eyebrow when he sees one with two boys on the cover, co riding a bicycle. 

It's titled 'The Way He Looks,' and it looks pretty damn gay; hence the reason Evan chooses it. 

"That one? That's amazing good choice Evan," He begins to put the disc in and while he does, Evan evaluates a few things.

1\. Connor wears skinny jeans.  _Really_ skinny.

2\. He winks at Evan and does that flirty smile thing.

3\. He owns a gay looking movie.

4\. He sits pretty close to Evan when he finishes putting the movie in.

So close in fact, their legs are grazing. All signs point to Connor not being that straight.

"This movie isn't in english so we'll have to settle with subtitles."

A few minutes in and so far Evan thinks Giovanni, the female best friend is adorable and when he says this, Connor only snorts. Another point.

When a pale curly haired boy came on screen Evan made a bold choice to see once and for all if Connor liked boys.

"He's hot," Evan spoke, immediately feeling the heat rush to his face. _God how could he that's so weird to sa-_

"God you're right," 

Oh. Good.

A while goes on before anything happens significantly between them until Connor groans loudly. 

"I've seen this a million times but the mutual pining still _kills_ me," He slumps slightly into Evan and said boy freezes for a moment before relaxing reluctantly. 

"Why don't they just kiss already damn," He mumbles and feels Connor laugh slightly beside him. 

As they watch the movie they don't cuddle up any more than just being pressed together, but it's still enjoyable nonetheless. 

When the movie ends Evan is near tears and Connor is just grinning like a doofus. 

"I'm hungry," Connor declares, standing up and tapping his fingers on his led. "Wanna order a pizza?"

"Oh! Sure! I-I didn't bring my wallet but I can go run and grab it-"

"Oh shut up Evan I got it," He says, no malice in his voice. "What do you like on your pizza? Pepperoni, cheese?"

Evan hums for a moment. "Pepperoni is good."

Connor orders and Evan looks at the walls of his living room. There's picture frames, they show him and a girl who shares many similarities to him, similar hair and the same dazzling bone structure.

She seems happy and the ages in the pictures range from children to what looks like high school, and in each one Connors smile shrinks just a little bit.

It's almost disheartening how in his high school graduation photo, he has no smile at all; however when Connor sits beside him, he's wearing one.

"So, why are you a journalist?" He asks, and he genuinely sounds interested.

"Well I was always praised on my essay writing and things so when I picked a major I chose that; And it's not just that I'm good at it it's actually really fun? I creative write in my free time because that's a good way to express yourself- I wrote an article on deforestation and it got really popular and that was pretty awesome because people like it and-" He stops when he stopped being able to breath. "I-I'm sorry I was ranting..."

Connor has his chin held up by his palm and his eyes were slightly hooded.

"You didn't stutter once, and it was hot," Connor says, completely casual as well.

"O-Oh.. Really?" Evan asks, swallowing and straightening his posture and trying to appear more confident. Connor smiles.

The mood is interrupted by the ring of a doorbell.

* * *

 

As Evan is gardening one evening, planing some red roses, he looks over to Connors house and sees the light in his living room.

They've hung out a few small times over the past two weeks and it's heaven finally having a friend, but something keeps bothering him. He has a crush on Connor.

It's small, but present, and he can tell it will grow.

He can see Connors silhouette dancing through the window. Evan stands and blinks, watching the boy spin and raise his arms slowly.

Enticing.

Somehow he ended up knocking on Connors door, impulsively wanting to see him dance up close.

When he answers he's out of breath and Evan almost loses his.

Connors long hair is tie up messily in a bun, and on his legs what looked like sweat pants but tight- leggings? He didn't know.

He was also wearing a leotard esc thing under it covering his chest. 

"Hey Nerd," He greets, smiling and opening the door for Evan to enter. "I was just practicing, which was probably obvious given my apparel."

"Ah, Awesome," Evan laughs nervously. "Mind if I watch?" And for the first time, Connors cheeks flush red.

"Oh! Yeah of course, I was uh, just kind of free styling but I can show you a piece I've been putting together?" He asks and Evan detects a bit of insecurities in his voice.

"S-Sure! Yeah," Evan notices the coffee table pushes to the wall for space.

"I'm not wearing fancy point shoes because satan sent those to earth, but I hope you enjoy,"

Evan sits and clasps his hands together, watching Connor hook his phone to a speaker and piano fulls the air. 

He starts the dance by standing in a confident way, making his arms loop in the shape of a basketball hoop meeting at his middle fingers. 

As he dances a dance of intricate jumps, spins, and stances, and the entire time he can't tear his eyes away. He moves in a way that makes Evan understand how he walked so gracefully when going to take his flowers.

He was stunning, his face concentrated and eyes cast downwards. 

His legs we're so long and every curve of them and his hips made Evan a little weak.

The movements of the dance were so beautiful and alluring, Evan's eyes stung from how little he allowed them to blink. When it ended and the piano faded out, his mouth was agape.

"...Did you like that?" Connor asked, voice wavering ever so slightly.

"Y-Yes I really did," he claps a few times for good measure.

Connor smiles and somehow Evan sees a whole new side of him, one that's vulnerable and even a little insecure.

"I'm glad," He crosses his arms. "Now in return, you need to show me that deforestation article, hm plant fucker?" Evan's eye widen. 

"Wh- I don't-"

"I'm joking babe," Connor laughs, taking his hair out of the bun and rolling the band on the wrist. "Hey, you obviously know my favorite color, what's yours?"

Evan panics, not really knowing. "I.. I don't have one?" He's blushing, flustered of the name Connor called him.

"Bullshit," Connor says matter-of-factly. "Everyone has one at least one that they find a little more appealing?"

"Um.." Evan thinks for a moment. "Yellow, I guess? I mean it's seen as a very positive color and- and I wanna be a positive person so so it's a good thought," Connor sits beside him and nods.

"Cute, I like it."

Connor looks at him wish an expression he can't decipher. 

"You intrigue Evan,"

* * *

 

It's been three days, and frankly Evan is worried.

Connor hasn't approached him since the dance night, nor answered his door- even his lights rarely turned on. 

Evan has many moments of panic because _'oh my god I just lost the gorgeous boy that has a good sense of humor and actually cares about me'_

However, when he hears his doorbell ring, it's Connor. He looks different.

He has dark bags under his eyes and his skin looks pale- paler than usual.

He's wearing baggy clothes and he's not smiling. 

"Hey..." 

"Connor... Come in," He opens the door and the second he steps in Connor looks like he's about to cry. 

"I'm sorry.. I ignored you and God Ev I'm so bad at friendships," He laughs coldly and avoids the others eyes. Evan closes the door and takes a step closer. 

"Connor.. I may be overstepping boundaries but I have a social and general anxiety disorder among other things and I-I can tell when people are having an episode," He speaks slowly so it doesn't seem aggressive. "Is there something I can do to help?"

Connor thinks, gaze cast to the ground and hands shaking. The rest of his body begins to shake as well and Evan blinks. 

He's never ha to help someone  _else_ that was having a panic attack, so he thought about what people did to help him.

He wrapped his arms around Connor, which is a feat init of itself due to their height difference. Connor crumples an the two both sit on their knees on the floor. 

Evan holds him as he shakes and sobs and after a few seconds grips onto him like he's a tether to reality. 

After the sobs die down Connor looks Evan in the eyes for the first time. 

"My dad's a cunt," Connor chuckles and tucks a lock of hair behind his ear. "He's a homophobe who thinks I lie about my mental health issues for attention." 

Evan feels himself tense seeing Connor like this was awful but knowing the reason was so much worse.

"He's a bastard," Evan grinds his teeth slightly and Connor notices, features softening. 

"Hey hey," He cups Evan's face with his hands, and that's the first time Evan realized how close they are. "I'm okay. I blocked his number and told him not to contact me. Don't worry i'm fine now." 

Connors other hand finds an holds his, running his fingers over Evan's tense knuckles. They're both blushing and close together but both of them need it, desperately.

"I don't- I mean, My dad left when I was like, six of seven," Evan stutters but Connor nods, hand not leaving his face.

"Guess we both have dad problems. My mom tries to help but she kind of enables Larry, my.. dad,"

"My mom used to be the only thing I lived for along with my friend Jared," 

"And now?" Connor asks, thumb reassuringly rubbing Evan's cheek. 

"Now... I have more."

Connor smiles and wipes the last of his tears with his other hand. Evan leans into the touch of Connor, and he sniffs. 

"We're sitting on the floor," Evan laughs quietly and and reluctantly stands, offering his hand to Connor. 

They migrate to the couch and Connor lays his lead in the others lap. Evan does nothing until he decides to run his fingers though Connors hair like he's wanted to for a few weeks now. 

He sees the others lips twitch in a smile. 

His hair is soft and thick, untangled and almost silky, Evan thinks it's just another perfect part of Connor.

He understands why Connor was ignoring him. His father upset him, and he lost his stability for a moment.

* * *

 

"I feel like I owe you this," Connor smiles shyly as he shows Evan the present. 

It's a pretty green succulent in a yellow pot, there are black swirl designs on said pot and Evan decided he was officially whipped. 

"And you call me the nerd," Evan laughs taking the plant. "I love it. What should I name him?" Connor thinks, head cocked to the side, his hair falling off his shoulder.

"Hm. Stacey," He says, immediately looks like her regrets it. 

"Stacey?" Evan's voice is amused as he looks down at said Stacey.

"It was the first name that came to mind!" He whined, laughing at himself and sighing.  "Hey, do you wanna hang out somewhere other than our houses?" 

Evan raises his eyebrows. "Hm? Like where?"

"Oh! There's a cafe near here," He says. "I have a few bucks-"

"Okay no Con, you payed for the pizza, least I could do is pay for your coffee or cookie," He sets down his succulent on his kitchen island, he smiles.

"Fine," Connor sighed but his lip twitched upwards. They walk to Evan's car and he holds the passenger door or Connor, smiling and bowing to make it dramatic.

As they drive to the cafe Connor describes and it's silent, but a comfortable, calm silence that encapsulates them.

They arrive an the cafe is lovely. It has brick walls and edison faerie lights strung around the ceiling.

"What do you want?" Evan asks, grabbing his wallet. 

"Just a Milkshake- chocolate. I'll be happy with that." 

Evan orders a Milkshake for Connor and a hot chocolate for himself. 

They find a small table by the window and sit and that's when the realization sits in.

_This is a lot like a date_

Neither of them said it, but it was understood. 

They sipped their drinks and talked, the conversation easy but they're both nervous because they want to impress one another.

They both knew they had something more than platonic feelings for one another, but they hadn't said anything. 

When they left the cafe, Evan dropped Connor off (Which wasn't that hard) And before he did, Connor kissed him sweetly on the cheek.

_Are they dating?!_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pLEASE COMMENT i'll love you forever


	3. understanding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I love you more than I love all the trees in the forest."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> theres a little bit of wink wonk but it's only a lil i promise

"Who is she?" Evan asks one evening, pointing to a picture of Connor and the girls he's seen in many Photos.   
  
He can feel the presence of the other beside him and he looks.  
  
"My sister," He answers simply. "Zoe."  
  
"What's she like?" Evan asks, itching at the skin on his hand.  
  
"She's... She's awesome and I love her  but at this point, I think my entire family doesn't care about me at all."  
  
Evan shakes his head and goes to sit on his couch.   
  
"If they don't then they're crazy,"  
  
"I'm crazy Evan,"  
  
There's a silence and it's stiff and thick.  
  
"No you're not," He holds out his hand and when the other takes it he pulls him to sit beside him. "Connor the word crazy fucking sucks and you are anything but that,"   
  
Connor smiles at him and shakes his head.   
  
"I don't deserve you,"

* * *

 

It was a pretty day outside, slightly breezy and warm as the two boys walked down a city street. It's not busy, but not empty either, cars passing them and a handful of people on the sidewalks.   
  
"Are you a cat person or a dog person?" Evan asks knuckles brushing against Connors. It's so simple, the way that the other turns his hand and intertwines their fingers.  
  
Then, so simply, they're holding hands in a random New Jersey street.   
  
"Cat. I love dogs but cats are more independent and easier to get along with I think," He explains as if nothing just happens.  
  
Their hands are relatively the same size, but Connors are a bit colder and a lot less shaky.   
  
"Oh! T-That's a good reason," Evan laughs in a nervous way.  
  
Connor softly rubs his thumb across Evans, and it's such a delicate action that makes his heart go wild.  
  
The crush Evan has on Connor is getting almost problematic, for the strict reason of he keeps getting distracted.   
  
Connor is telling a story at the moment gesturing with his hands, nail polish chipped and hands covered in marker.  
  
It's so hard to focus on what he saying when with every word Evan's heart tightens a little more.  
  
"You have pretty eyes," Evan mentions, for once not regretting his outburst.  
  
Connor's mouth was agape and he almost blushed.   
  
"I.. Thank you, Ev," They share a smile, neither knowing what to say. "So do you, you have a nice everything,"  
  
 **There goes the confidence** , Evan thinks, looking down immediately.   
  
God  
  
He was so whipped

* * *

 

 "Gardening is hard," Connor notes, attempting to brush the soil off of his palms.   
  
"Well, It's only hard if you're thinking about it."  
  
It's mid-afternoon and they sat near the orange flowers, knees touching as they planted the Dahlia's.  
  
Connor smirked, giggling evilly and that's when Evan knew he should've changed his phrasing.  
  
"H-Hey!" He shoves Connor back lightly by the shoulder. "Stop making everything dirty!"   
  
"We're gardening Ev, everything already pretty dirty." Evan looks at him, and he sees Connor.  
  
Connor, the boy with anger and pain in his eyes, but the compassion in them grows every day.  
  
The boy with a steady yet careless laugh, and the sense of humor that made Evan fall to the floor and clutch his stomach.   
  
As he looked at the other, the way he moved and smiled and blinked up at Evan; he simply adored him.   
  
Connor pats down a small lump of soil and looks at it proudly, the flower looking slightly lopsided but still beautiful.   
  
Evan is more focused on Connor though, and his chest felt heavy yet light at the same time, and he wondered what would happen if he kissed him.  
  
When the other looks up at him, he's grinning, eyes almost sparkling.  
  
"I think I did pretty well," He laughs and when the other doesn't respond he tilts his head. "You okay?"  
  
"I'm better than okay," He says, turning more towards Connor and his cheeks burn. "I-I want you to kiss me."  
  
Silence.   
  
He can feel his heart thumping, almost _hear_ it.   
  
"Oh fuck I'm Sorry that was so out of line I shouldn't ha-" Evan stops talking when he feels lips on his own and a hand on his face. His eyes widen but he kisses back almost desperately.  
  
It's slow yet urgent, like an unspoken agreement.   
  
Connor slowly moves forward and Evan gets the hint, laying down and feeling the grass beneath him. Connor is holding himself up above him and they continue to kiss, everything moving so fast yet so painfully slow.  
  
Evan loops his arms around Connors' neck, pulling him deeper.   
  
Connors' lips are soft and smooth, and the boy tastes like strawberries and chocolate and Evan makes a note to ask him about that later.   
  
He feels the others hands in his hair, and the kiss gets heavier and it just sinks in that Evan is making out with his crush next to his garden, where they met.   
  
And then, miraculously, Connor lets Evan take control, and he's kissing him like the world is ending that day.  
  
They eventually both pull away and gasp, breathing heavily. Connor rests his forehead on Evan's and when he fully leans up and sits, Evan can see he's smiling.   
  
"So, now we talk about feelings?"

* * *

 

 "So, does this makes up boyfriends?" Connor asked. "Because I'd very much like that.."  
  
"Yes! W-Well I mean I guess if you want? Please?"  
  
Connor laughs and leans over and kisses Evan again, and that answered it enough.   
  
"We need to go on an official date, Evan, let me take you on a date please?"  
  
When the day finally comes, Evan dresses in a blue colored shirt **Connors favorite color** and black jeans. Semi-formal.   
  
He looks at himself in a mirror over and over, putting strands of hair in place and continuously brushing the already gone dust off of his shirt.   
  
The doorbell rings and Evan takes a deep breath, opening it and suddenly his breath is taken away again.  
  
Connors shirt was black as usual, but the thing that made Evan's heart melt was the sloppily stitched, small yellow heart on the chest.  
  
"You're beautiful," Connor says, holding his hand out for Evan to take.  
  
"You're one to talk," Evan snorts, and when Connor kisses him he realizes it will never get old feeling those lips on his.  
  
Connor drives him to an old abandoned orchard, dismissing Evan's questions will the wave of a hand.   
  
"C'mon,"  
  
He leads him to a pile of blankets and a large pillow in an empty field.  "We can go to dinner later, I wanna stargaze with you,"  
  
"That's... perfect,"   
  
Before he knows it, he's laying beside Connor and looking at the stars.   
  
He can't describe the butterflies he feels when he touches Connor other than fairytale-like. His head is on Evan's chest and he is almost melting while he runs his fingers through his hair.   
  
"You mean a lot to me," Connor says, breaking the calm silence of the night. "And I really mean that I've never met someone that I've connected with like I connect with you."  
  
"That's.. Really gay Connor," He feels the other laugh. "But, You mean the world to me and I'm so lucky to have you."  
  
Though they aren't in the position to see each other's faces even without that they can tell they're both sharing a smile.  
  
"I didn't think someone like you could want me," Evan admits, pointer finger tracing hearts onto Connors' shoulder.   
  
"That's ridiculous," He responds. "You're sweet and funny and.. and beautiful like you don't even know,"  
  
"One could describe you as such,"   
  
They sit there, looking at the shimmering stars in the painted dark sky, for what seemed like hours, but it's disrupted when Connor sits up and turns to hover above Evan.   
  
"This is perfect," He says. "You are perfect Evan,"  
  
Evan doesn't respond verbally, instead of in the way he grabs the soft collar of Connors shirt to pull him in.  
  
It's innocent and heavy yet nervous, like everything in their relationship has been.   
  
They kiss beneath the sky and as they pull away and just stare at one another, the rest of the world seems to fall away.

* * *

  
  
"Dance with me Evan," Connor says one Friday evening, humming to the music that played.   
  
"I-I can't.. I can't dance Connor I can't-"  
  
"No, come on please?" He changes the song and Evan recognize it as Kiss Me by Ed Sheeran.   
  
Connor stands and holds his hand out excitedly, smile so big Evan couldn't help but agree.  
  
As the first verse plays Connor puts his hand on Evan's shoulder and holds his other.   
  
What do I do with my other hand? Evan panics. Oh, his hip.  
  
 _And your heart's against my chest, your lips pressed to my neck_  
  
Connor leads, both of them keeping their eyes on the ground to see their own movements.   
  
_I'm falling for your eyes, but they don't know me yet_  
 _And with a feeling I'll forget, I'm in love now_  
  
The song is beautiful and so is Connor. The boy looks so calm as they gaze into each other's eyes, electricity radiating off of both of them.   
  
_Kiss me like you wanna be loved_  
 _You wanna be loved_  
 _You wanna be loved_  
  
Listening to the music, Evan leans to peck Connor's nose and he wrinkles his nose in response.  
  
 _This_ _feels like falling in love_  
 _Falling in love_  
 _We're falling in love_  
  
They feel something between them, the words of the song set in. Oh my gosh I love him don't I  
  
The thoughts make Evan feel warm and he pulls Connor closer, and now they're barely dancing, instead just swaying.  
  
As the song continues they both feel the words radiating from them.  
  
   
  
    **I love you**  
  
 **I love you**  
  
 **I love yo-**  
  
"I love you,"   
  
Evan says it. Those three words that make the world erupt around them.  
  
"I love you too,"  
  
 _Falling in love_  
 _We're falling in love_

* * *

  
  
 Evan has noticed that Connor's eyes change for him.  
  
When he meets other people, Connor's eyes are guarded and almost afraid; afraid to be hurt, afraid to be angry.  
  
It's obvious that he's been through a lot, But, with Evan, the walls crumble away.  
  
Evan's anxiety seems to not disappear, but fade when he's alone with Connor. He feels like he doesn't have to try so hard, and that he can actually be himself for once in his godforsaken life.  
  
They're lying one night in Evan's house in his bed, not doing anything, just cuddling and enjoying each others presence.  
  
They're both so _calm_ , hearts beating in sync and breathing even.  
  
"You should just sleep here. I wanna cuddle all night I don't want you to leave," Evan admits, stroking his boyfriends hair.  
  
"Mm. Might as well, I'm comfy and If I leave we'll both be lonely," He responds, eyes fluttering shut as his entire body is draped over Evan. "Goodnight," he says, and then, those three words that sent fireworks into Evan's chest. "I love you,"

* * *

  
"Come on, don't be a wuss," Evan laughs as he watches Connor try to follow him up the tree.  
  
Compulsive tree climbing is Evan's hobby, so he decided to let his favorite person in on it.  
  
"Try me Hansen," He laughs, struggling to reach the other.  
  
Evan's hands sting a little bit from the sharp bark of the tree but it was a feeling that was almost addicting to him. Connor eventually joins him on the branch and sighs in relief.  
  
"Either I'm out of shape or you're way too good at this," He says.  
  
Evan smiles and feels the heat of the sun on his face, and he realizes he's never been happier than he is right now.

* * *

  
  
"Can I be honest with you?" Connor asks while stirring his coffee. He had slept over at Evan's for some.. rather none innocent activities, and it was the next morning now.  
  
"Sure," He responded, smiling at Connor's messy hair and at the fact that he was wearing one of Evan's shirts.  
  
"I think subconsciously I started taking your flowers to get close to you?"  
  
It's a small smile that Evan has at first but it breaks into a grin.  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Now don't you dare hold this against me Evan Thomas Hansen," He commands. "But yes. I always saw you gardening and I thought, 'He is so gorgeous and so interesting, I want to know more about him' And I told myself I wanted just the flowers but," He shakes his head.  
  
"Well, I can't say I'm mad you did," Evan chuckles, rubbing the small of Connor's back and It and shivers over the latter's spine. Connor leans into him naturally and then turns, wrapping his arms around Evan's neck and grazing his lips against his cheek.  
  
"I wanna kiss you more," he admits quietly. "I can't get enough of you. You take my breath away."  
  
No one has ever spoken to Evan in this way, but it no longer feels nervous, it's natural and lovely and perfect.  
  
"If you wanna kiss me then go ahead," Evan almost purrs, and when the other obliges it's an alluring and deep kiss, the kinds that some people only dream of.  
  
Connor pulls away and shakes his head. "I love you, and I can never say it enough can I?" He rests his forehead on Evan's and it's like their first kiss all over again. "I love you,"  
  
Evan kisses him again but it's only a peck, then he kisses his nose, both of his cheeks, his forehead, and then his lips again. "I love you more than I love all the trees in the forest."

* * *

  
  
"Love, help me with this box."   
  
Evan quickly helps lift the box and carries it to the corner, setting it down. The cardboard is a bit weak but still sturdy.  
  
They've been together for a little over seven months now, and it was now the time to move in together. Connor moved his things to Evan's house and after all the boxes are in place it's mid-evening.  
  
"This is so much work," Connor speaks up again, his hair is tied up sloppily and gosh, Evan loves him.   
  
 "We can take a break now, let's go sit outside,"  
  
They cling to one another by hands as they set themselves a few feet from the garden in which they met.  
  
"I love you," Connor reminds, setting his hand on Evan's knee and looking at him in the eyes. "So fucking much,"  
  
Evan smiles, putting his hand atop of his. "I love you more. Lay with me," The two lay down beside each other, looking at the cloud clad sky in admiration.  
  
Their hands find each other like magnets and Connor rubs the skin like velvet.  
  
"I'm so lucky that you stole those flowers," Evan comments after a moment. "I should thank you, without that, I would have never found you."  
  
Connor rolls to his side so he's facing his boyfriend. "I stole your flowers and your heart," They share a laugh and Connor kisses him.  
  
"Forget working, let's just lay here for a while."  
  
In suburban New Jersey lived a small white house with a small white fence.  
  
In the back of this house, an extravagant garden with flowers ranging from all colors; and if you happen to look close enough, you might find that one or two go missing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i can't begin to describe how happy your comments make me, every time i see one, it makes my entire fucking day thank you so much !!! i love yaa

**Author's Note:**

> if y'all want the rest lemme know if you enjoyed? i'm nervous about this because i spent a while writing and i hope people like it so yeah!! new parts (hopefully) coming soon.


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